(Trigger warnings, graphic cancer details, anxiety and suicide. This is not meant to reflect my writing style or ideas, but a full imitation of Dave. Also, this is the ’90s and does not reflect the current housing market.)
A Heartbreaking Work Of Staggering Genius, Dave Eggers, 1995, 9/12
You will rot the wood from under my feet. You will cut the strings off the giant Jesus and let it fall on my head. You have given me AIDS, probably.
But I’m still going to perform frisbee tricks with my little brother. When you take him to a foster home, I will bust him out and we’ll fly like falcons. We’ll let the air scream our feathers back, all the way back, balding us.
When Chicago rids us of our parents with cancer, we go to Berkeley. When Berkeley kicks us out, we drive to San Francisco. When San Francisco gets dull, we fly. We fly! All the way to New York!
You have but a Sad Role to play in the book of my life; the suicidal friend, the helpless little brother, but I will always be sadder! For I am the Sad Adult-ish Orphan Parent Stand-In For Little Brother! No, I don’t have proof. And you will pity us!